Ramblings

This was definately ramblings. I this on the 26th as well. I guess that was a slow day or a slow moment. I can not even remember what I was thinking when I typed that.

"The one thing that a person should never lose is hope. Hope brings a strength to you when you are weak to the seemingly impossible things in your mind. Never lose hope. Life will be fill with a darkness that will never let light through."

"I search for all the happiness in my life to give to you. I search to give all of me to you. Gladly, I will walk into your life and stay peacefully. My smiles will be always for you and with the thought of you. I hope to reflect my love for you always in my kisses and hugs. I hope to always show you my love in my actions."

I figure I was really bored that moment or just needed some release. I can not remember. :D

Poem

I wrote this since the 26th of March while I was on work. I
don't know why I took so long to share. Well, maybe I do know.
Because it is incomplete. Well, it seems to me to be incomplete.

~
I wish for a love,
That starts a fire in my heart.
That burns through the veins of my body.
Which light will shines through my eyes,
And glow on my smile.

I wish to be touch gently,
And also rough.
A touch that can clear my mind,
And erase all fears.
An embrace that will be felt
Always on my body.

I wish to always feel you.
A connection so strong,
That words will be hardly needed.
~

Thirteen Things.

I am a romantic. Most of the times, when my mind has the time to wander, I am thinking of love. I will make a list of thirteen things my partner must have. Well, this will be more of a guidlines of what to look for.

1. Must be respectful of my opinions and me.
   
2. Must be caring, loving and generous.
3. Must have a sense of humour.
4. Must be able to have a conversation.
5. Must be what I consider attractive.
6. Must be steady-minded, having clear goals in mind.
7. Must be capable of interacting with my family and friends.
8. Must be trust-worthy.
9. Should be capable of appreciating different forms of art, that is movies and music.
10. Should not be too secretive.
11. Must not have petty ways and nasty attitudes.
12. Must have a connection with me.
13. Must be capable of being sponateous.

All that I wish my partner to be, I wish for myself to be for him. I am a romantic. Not just to my heart, but to the blood in my veins. I am trying to give different guys a chance, but I am looking for the one guy that makes not even question myself if I like him. Though, all the things on my list are important, I believe number 12 is what I look for most.

I can see you...

I have another dream that I would like to share. It is about my co-worker and friend.

I dreamt the co-worker was a werewolf but I was seeing her in human form with this long black dreads. She is short, fair-skinned, so the long ras was a shocker. She was looking for me in my dream to fight. I wasn't scared of her, but more shock that she was a werewolf. I was looking at her and I saw my friend pointing to all the places she believed I will be. It had seem as if my friend was under a spell.

Well basically that was the jest of my dream. Now, this co-worker of mines is very two-face and a dirty scammer. The same friend that is in my dream, told me of everything that she does. Things I wish not to know. Now, when we first meet, I was the first one to talk to her and the first one to disike her. My friend took to her more and I decided to stay out of their friendship.

Sometime after that, like some weeks, my friend told me of her ways and the shit she does and get away with. But my whole problem isn't what she gets away. My problem is that she kind of gets my friend in trouble or have people questioning her. My friend doesn't like it but she keeps protecting this co-worker. She tells me whenever she tells her about it, the co-worker just laughs. Imagine this, up to now, my friend will still cover for her.

I am not going to interrupt their friendship. That is her friend. She has a hold over her but she like her. Who is me to question the people that a person choose to have in their life?

My dreams mean...

I love finding out what my dreams mean. Recently, I had this dream.
~
Dream One-
I was in a taxi in my area. The driver parked next to another car and left to go somewhere. I was talking to the driver in the other car because I knew him. Then I saw this guy walking with his dog towards this group of little birds. When he reach them, they started to follow him in a line. After a while, they all flew to a tree for their food which it had this big spider. All of sudden, I was in this jail place and they was putting two guys in their cell. The cell was the size of a wardrobe.
~
Basically that was the dream. I look up a few main things from the dream in a success dream book my mum has.
Birds - Denote success in your present undertakings.
Spider - To see one in you sleep, denotes that you will receive a sum of money in a short time.
Cell - To dream of a cell is a sign that you will experience a little inconvenience.

Now, I dreamt this a week before I was suppose to get paid and remember saying I hope the inconvenience isn't with my money. Say I dreamt that on the 27th or the 28th of March, it is now the freaking 13th of April. What the hell! I want my money.

Misreading

It had this guy Marlon who had like me. I haven't heard of him in about two to three weeks, so I would use the past tense that he had like me. He was trying hard for me to like him, but everything he was doing was turning me off. I like things to have an easy flow but it just wasn't happening. I know body language speak loudly, but sometimes a person respond to something that wasn't directed to them. Ok, here is an example. Folding your arms is a negative sign depending on the situation where it was display. Now, my friend and her boyfriend is standing to the back of me. Marlon was standing to the back of them. My friend was talking with her boyfriend and I don't know what Marlon was doing, but I was looking for transport. So I step up from them and look up the road for transport, saw none and fold my arms, continuing to look up the road. All of sudden, I would hear him say "That is a sign of rejection." He came closer to me and say again.
Plainly, I said to him "If I was speaking to you and did that, well then you can say that. But was we speaking? No!" He said I had a point. He said something after that but I tune him out. It was late and I wanted to go home.

Exercise for my fingers

This past two weeks was mainly a quiet week. I haven't been anywhere else besides work and home. So basically, all I have been doing is watching t.v., which sucks cuz t.v. has nothing. I have been watching these new shows on mtv, parental control and yo momma. I don't even want to glimpse yo momma again. Parental control seems cool enough but I don't understand the kind of dates they go on. I guess I am more traditional because wrestling lessons, isn't what I will consider a date, or a date idea. However, this show, sweet sixteen, is just to show off how much money you have and how spoil your child is. It really sickening sometimes. I realise alot of shows I used to view, I don't no more. I use to love smallville, one tree hill andcharmed, but it had reach a point where I just got fed up. I generally, now, only want to watch movies.
I realise tonight, that have this soft spot for tender parts in movies or sitcoms. Anytime someone is sad or depressed, I always wish I was there to make them happy. Or just to let them know I am there. I don't ever know what I would say, I would have just want to hold their hand. I like people to know that I am here to listen.

Fresh Egg Shell

Well I have this new found self esteem about myself. I am glad to have found it. I feel better about myself than I have felt ever. But this new self discovery, I hope not to change. With that fear that my personality might change, I somehow built a stronger shell around me. Very silly of me. But at else with this egg, I can break and built that shell anytime I want.