Friday, November 11, 2005

Where Your Friends At

I have been actually delaying myself from making a post. I just felt that I must have something to say first before I make another post. These days I realised the main thing (amongst other things) on my mind is about friends. I do not claim to have any friends though the friends I have believe that I do. But actually, I believe that they are few. The silly thing is that I am very friendly, and I will always talk to you if you had spoken. Even if I liked you or not, I can not deny the fact that I heard you speak. I always like making new friends. I like to see what other people have to offer and me to them.
Recently, two of my girl friends made the comment that I have alot of male friends. Probably, I do. I don't even know for sure. I believe that it is about the same. Each one of my friends represent a different part of my personality. But the one thing, I really do not have is a best friend. That one true friend. I have, yes, good, caring friends but not that best friend. I had one when I was young. Yes, she was good and caring but as we got older, she was more using me. I saw that early but for her being two years older than me, I never really speak up for myself. Though I have no problem speaking up for others in need. So, now I only see her when she needs something. Which I don't really have a problem. I became accustom to her not being there. I never confide in her. Old as I am and young as I was, I never did. Pen, paper and my mirror holds all my secrets. And God.
But I also believe that the people that I meet over the Internet know me better that ones in real life as they are exposed to more of me. But I am working on showing my friends more of me by showing them the poetry that I write every now and again. So life isnt over yet, I can always find a best friend. There is always hope.

2 comments:

Meadow said...

It's nice to learn more about you. :)

Brea said...

I can really relate to this post. Most of my freinds are males b/c there is less drama (until they get girlfriends!). And I grew out of my childhood best friend and really would like to have that one best friend again. I wish you the best as you open up to the people in your life.